Jude Part 2

To counter all of the attacks that have come against Jude in the previous discussion boards, I would like to mention the character of Sue.

Sue epitomizes the current and ever-growing view of marriage in our society. At the time of Jude’s publication, being unsure of marriage was an uncommon and largely unheard-of thing. But these days, men and women (women in particular) are getting married at older and older ages, and their marriages are less and less permanent. Divorce is common, and civil unions are coming into existence in Europe to cope with the changes in the institution of marriage. Sue is constantly changing her mind about marrying Jude, despite his desperate attempts to wed her. After her first resolution to marry him, Hardy writes a dialog between Sue and Jude, “…Jude, do you think that when you must have me with you by law, we shall be so happy as we are now? ...Don’t you think it is destructive to a passion whose essence is its gratuitousness?’ ‘Upon my word, love, you are beginning to frighten me, too, with all this foreboding! Well, let’s go back and think it over.’ Her face brightened. ‘Yes—so we will!’” (Thomas Hardy, Jude the Obscure Norton Critical Edition p.213-214).

The book also illustrates another common way to deal with bridal fear: elopement (Or at least theoretical elopement). Jude and Sue travel to London to keep appearances and play that they are married and have it all together, when they are really still doomed to relationship failure. “The result was that shortly after the attempt at the registrar’s the pair went off—to London it was believed—for several days, hiring somebody to look to the boy. When they came back they let it be understood indirectly, and with indifference and weariness of mien, that they were legally married at last. Sue, who had previously been called Mrs. Bridehead, now openly adopted the name of Mrs. Fawley. Her dull, cowed, and listless manner for days seemed to substantiate all this” (Thomas Hardy, Jude the Obscure Norton Critical Edition p.234-235).

But Sue’s insecurity is just one part of the insecurity epidemic that has befallen our culture. We have so many options and choices that we don’t ever need to make choices. We can just go back on our word and re-choose everything if we change our minds. Commitment is the new challenge for Americans, and it spans everything we do. So few decisions are permanent these days that I wonder how much longer it will be before everything we hold as permanent falls away due to lack of commitment? Will wedding vows change, swearings-in, oaths of office?

I guess I would consider myself a bit more old-fashioned in this sense; I keep my word and stick by my decisions, whether they are good or not. Maybe I picked the wrong major, the wrong university, the wrong church, the wrong friends, the wrong set of beliefs. But sticking to your guns is more important than being right. To me, it is a sign of good leadership, and taking the consequences for your actions is admirable and should be mandatory for anyone who holds a position of importance.

What if Jude and Sue had officially tied the knot? She says herself that even so, she would have left him and gone back to Phillotson, “But how if you and I had married legally, as we were on the point of doing?’ ‘I should have felt just the same—that ours was not a marriage and I would go back to Richard without repeating the sacrament, if he asked me” (Thomas Hardy, Jude the Obscure Norton Critical Edition p.283). But since that wasn’t actually the case, we’ll never know for sure what would have happened.

Indeed, if we lose all firmness of conviction, what weight will anyone’s word have anymore?